Comments for Spilt Milk

Comment on Feels Like The Last Time by Lara K.

Lara K. — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 20:48:11 +0000

This was a lovely, thoughtful piece and it made me cry.
I had to stop breastfeeding Jack way before he or I was ready because his jaw was so tight that he couldn’t nurse properly and he was losing weight and I was in excruciating pain. He was just six weeks old when I finally threw in the towel after seemingly endless appointments with lactation consultants, a chiropractor, cranial sacral therapist, osteopath, and pediatric occupational therapist. I was getting virtually no sleep, pumping at all hours of the night and day. I finally realized that I was slipping into a serious depression and decided that a happy, sane formula-feeding mama was probably better for him than a depressed, exhausted, attempting-to-breastfeed-at-all-costs mama.
But I grieved so much for the loss of that physical connection with my new baby - I wasn’t ready to let it go. I prayed for my milk to dry up quickly because it was a reminder of all I had lost. I remember sitting in the warm bath tub watching the milk leak from my breasts and sobbing.
It was obviously a different situation, but it’s a sad moment whenever it happens. Though certainly liberating (after I let myself grieve for a few days, I left Jack with Damian for an entire day and went skiing with a girlfriend and then got a private hot tub at a beautiful mountain spa - something I couldn’t have done if I was nursing).
We do plan on having another (yes, I am apparently a complete sadist who loves being tortured) and I’m hoping that nursing goes better the second time around so that I can mark that bittersweet milestone, as you did, with a calm (though nostalgic) awareness.
Happy birthday, little Carmen!! You’re lucky to have my lovely and talented cousin as your amazing mama.

Comment on Feels Like The Last Time by Betsy

Betsy — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 02:46:24 +0000

This is a beautiful essay, conjuring up so many evocative emotions. How true, how little weight we give to this major milestone in the mother-child journey. Thanks for sharing.

Comment on Preschool Graduation by Jan

Jan — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 00:11:35 +0000

My little daughter came home from school one day telling me they were going to have a spring celebration, and that she was going to be (or so I heard) a Maple Dancer. It was rather a letdown once she patiently explained it all to me.
I think that I would have really liked Maple Dancers.

Comment on Feels Like The Last Time by Jan

Jan — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 23:38:48 +0000

My youngest child is 23 now, and I’m pushing 60. I still remember the soft, warm feel of her head nestled in the crook of my arm, and the shared, incomparable intimacy of nursing. I too was both glad and sad when it finally ended. The children have to grow up…but some of the memories stay with you forever.

Comment on One Day Till 5 by Robin

Robin — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 22:52:49 +0000

A beautiful photo of one our 3 beautiful grand daughters! You have done and are doing a super job with your wonderful, smart,creative and challenging girls. Wouldn’t you worry if they were always biddable and not the wonderful sometimes fractious people they are? That might get boring!
XOXO,

Comment on Feels Like The Last Time by Pop

Pop — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 18:23:21 +0000

What a sweet, poignant piece!

It’s hard to believe that’s C all in pink frills. Compare the picture of her in your blog about ripping library books - that is the C I know.

Comment on Feels Like The Last Time by Michelle

Michelle — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 19:15:51 +0000

WOW- Incredibly well written- you have my husband and I both in tears at the thought of our 2 year old growing up. She has mostly weaned herself, with the exception of at naptime, and of course, all through the night ;^) I have been reading a lot on LLL’s website about weaning and am alway moved to tears, the same way that your story has moved me today. It is so bittersweet to think of our babies growing up and not needing us in that way anymore. I applaud your strength for going this long, and also for taking the plunge towards independence from one another!

Comment on The Baby Cave by Feels Like The Last Time

Feels Like The Last Time — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 19:51:23 +0000

[...] am I not celebrating this milestone– the final 12 months of The Baby Cave, which, I’ve been told, lasts till the youngest is 4? Why am I not running full-tilt to the [...]

Comment on Appetite For Destruction by Pop

Pop — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 19:26:55 +0000

What a marvelous column! Maybe now that she’s three, C’s destructive proclivities will dissipate. by the way, I don’t buy her story about the scary tiger.

Pop

Comment on Zoo Story by Desha Peacock

Desha Peacock — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 13:23:57 +0000

Love the zoo story- so true, we hype it all up and then shout “SEEE!!!” and they are like, “i’d be just as happy with an ice cream and a kitty walking by in the neighborhood”. Still, it’s good to good out- good for you!